( The emos and mitten wearing thugs... )
I might as well hate on some more groups that surround me in my every day life.
Hmm... let's start with some cyber goths.
If you don't know what a cyber goth is, good. It means you haven't had a voodoo doll made after you. You're safe. But just to explain it, it's a group that's almost like goths... but it's got a techno twist on it.
Like, instead of raving, they do this thing called "industrial" dancing. It's like the longboard of skateboarding. If you can't ride a skateboard, do something like it, but pretend that it's been your main intention the entire time.
Cyber goth's look almost exactly like regular goths, but with fake dreadlock extensions.
(Oh quit pretending that shit is real. We all know it's not. )
They wear trip pants... trip skirts...
And those fluffies.
( Like what the ravers wear... those furry boots? But god forbid they wear something pastel colored. )
( Again, screaming knockoff. You're welcome to argue with me about this. )
They go about, hating their lives. Worshiping the devil... hating on the dreadful happy children of the sun.
I can't honestly say I know much about them... I mean, I guess I'd have to be a daughter of the night to really know, hmm? Maybe it's time for a social experiment.
On the other hand though... they don't like outsiders. So I guess I'm S.O.L. on this one.
I'll post some links for you guys like
this >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> INDUSTRIAL DANCING, for the win. Or loss? You decide.
AND THIS>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> She's 100% original guys. Don't you ever judge her or think she's weird. She's normal. A child of the dark. You preps wouldn't understand.
Basically, if you want to be cyber goth,
(of course, you can be born this way, but you want to be a wannabe cyber goth, )
You have to mess up your haircut beyond repair.
And I'm not talking a bit off the ends.
I mean, you seriously cut that shit off.
If your bangs are longer than your pinkie finger, you have some serious issues.
Poseur.
And if you happen to be a cyber goth MALE, You better make sure your makeup is better than your girlfriend's. I would hate to see you have some natural eyebrows. So "jumping on the bandwagon".
Of course, I'm not just going to hate on emos, mitten wearing thugs (anybody have one word name for them??) and cyber goths.
Oh no.
I'm going balls deep.
Let's get down and dirty and talk about something..
well...
dirty.
Because if you're hipster, taking a shower is OUT OF THE QUESTION. ( See hipster girls here. )
A true hipster, ( if you didn't already know. ) is someone who does everything "abnormally".
So if the current trend is contacts, you be sure to wear some of your "prescription" glasses. Because we all know you can't see without those. Especially those lens-punched-out 3D glasses. Not only do you look completely out of the ordinary in those... you're also making a statement to the world that says;
"Yeah, I wear glasses while I sleep. Because I don't live by societies rules".
Hipsters are also known as those "one up" people.
You can spot one by yelling into a crowd; "I like Phish".
And I'm sure you'll get at least one flannel wearing douchebag to approach you with the header, "I liked that first", as they take a deep drag from their natural made cigarette, and wear a deep, thoughtful look on their face. Because after all, the world is amazingly puzzling. And we should all take the time to assess every
god
damn
detail
of
everything
we come across.
To a hipster, everything has a deeper meaning. And god help you if you find yourself trying to break up with someone who's converted into a hipster. Not only will you be ending a relationship, but you'll be causing a global catastrophe, because one negative attitude in the world, and mother nature throws a fit. Don't you know?? That's why we have hurricanes, disease, and poverty. Because mother nature is upset with the way we treat her and each other.
One love, bitches.
( By the way, I liked bob marley first. Before you did. )
I'm going to hell.
I also wanted to talk about one more social group for the night... and that would be scene kids.
Of course, most scene kids now, have converted to hipsterism. But there's those few to refuse to make the well needed change to hipsterville. Because honestly, Being a hipster in my book is considered one step up from scene.
Scene kids are like, colorful emo kids. Just... with more hairspray and fake hair. I can't tell you the number of times I'll be walking through a grocery store, and I smell ( yes, smell. ) a scene kid from 6 isles down. These kids wear the small skinny jeans and ridiculous band tees too. But the difference is, that they actually try to make the t-shirts the same color as their hair. Which has been dyed a couple hundred times. Besides the fact that they look like they put a bale of blue and black straw on their head, ( hidden by some beanie signed by Black Veil Brides. ) ( Black veil brides... for those who don't know what the hell I'm talking about. ) they wear oversized jewelry, that makes even the biggest woman look like an oompa loompa.
And can we talk about that hair.
If you were meant to have poofy hair like that, you would have been born in Florida. ( Thank you humidity... I'll save that story for another time. )
But thank you for taking it upon yourself to build a nest in your hair. I'm sure the birds appreciate it. Save the earth, man.
I also want to mention that the bows that they wear are absolutely outrageous. Nothing is as big a turn on, as a fake felt piece of sparkle in that nest you call hair. I can't even describe how hot that is.
They also have 'scene kings' and 'queens'. Which is basically another way to say that they have idols who look worse than they do. Nothing, and you can quote me on this...
is attractive about fake everything.
If you have fake hair,
fake nails,
fake faces,
fake clothes,
and fake personalities... you are already considered fake. So don't go off on those little teenieboppers who try to "be like you". Because you're nothing original. You're also nothing like barbie, so please stop adding that to the end of your name on Facebook.
That and gore, vanity, brutality, bestiality, star, cannibal, acid,
Affliction
Alarming
Amphetamine
Ammoniac
Arson
Accident
Asylum
Angelbites
Beastly
Bitchin
Botox
Bleeding
Blaze
Blade
Bloody
Blitzkrieg
Bones
Bleak
Core
California
Catastrophe
Cryptic
Cancer
Corpse
Caged
Caffeine
Caliber
Cadaver
Chaos
Chainsaw
Clandestine
Crestfallen
Cemetary
Cocaine
Disaster
Danger
Dammit
Darkness
Damage
Deadly
Decay
Deceit
Demonic
Derailed
Destruction
Devotion
Dissection
Entropy
Electrocute
Eyeliner
Epitaph
Ember
Elegiac
Emergency
Exhilarant
Explosive
Eruption
Ecstasy
Forlorn
Famous
Fantasy
Fallacy
Flare
Fire
Forgery
Fragments
Frozen
Frightful
Frighten
Phobia
Fer Sure
Gore
Glamour
Grind
Grindcore
Gangsta
Grave
Grind
Grotesque
Ghostly
Horror
Hazard
Hardcore
Haunting
&Hearts;
Heartless
Hectic
Hellacious
Harmful
Hindenburg
Haters
Hopeless
Heroin
Homicide
Impurity
Imprisoned
Isolation
Infanticide
Insomnia
Jealous
Jackknife
J’taime
Jolt
Kissable
Klepto
Kickass
Ketamine
Kilter
Kore
Katastrophe
Korpse
Kaliber
Kadaver
Lonely
Lust
Languish
Liar
Laceration
Lachrymose
Lipstick
Lavish
Leeches
Loathsome
Lobotomy
LAWLZ
Massacre
Mascara
Malicious
Murder
Melancholy
Makeup
Mishap
Macabre
Machine-gun
Malignant
Maimed
Murder
Matrix
Mosh
Morphine
Malarkeys
Narcotic
Narcissistic
Ninja
Knives
Notorious
Necrophile
Nerve-gas
Nihilistic
Nocturnal
Outrageous
Obscure
Obscene
OMG
Oh Emm Gee
Passion
Patricide
Perfection
Peroxide
Party
Panicked
Queen
Questionable
Rad
RAWR
Radical
Random
Radioactive
Radiation
Rage
Rampant
Rarity
Ravage
Razors
Redemption
Rivalry
Rocket
Rockets
Rocker
Rogue
Revolver
Wrath
Stilettos
Star
Savage
Suicide
Scars
Scarred
Shotgun
Smash
Slam
Storm
Psycho
Tsunami
Skullduggery
Scandalous
Stomp
Throwdown
Tabasco
Terror
Terrify
Tornado
Toxic
Usury
Untouchable
Vaccine
Vanity
Velocity
Vicious
Velvet
Vigilante
Vintage
Vivisect
Vulgar
Wicked
Ouigi
Weeping
Weed
Whine
Wow
Core
Yield
Yesterday
Zap
Zoned-out
OR
Zodiac.
It's annoying. Can't tell you how much I hate getting a friend request from someone, and trying to figure out who the hell they are.
"Brittany who? Brutal? Brittany Brutal? Who the hell is that"?
And it's not like I could tell who you are from that overly photoshopped picture you have. You look like a pile of walmart bags and eyeliner to me.
SO
That concludes my rant tonight. I'll definitely be doing more soon. (: Have a good night guys. I hope I got a smile out of you.
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